The leader of a Mexican criminal cartel was swept up by authorities after allegedly ordering the brutal murders of his son’s beauty influencer ex-girlfriend and a mayor. Ramón Ángel Álvarez Ayala was arrested in late July by military personnel…
From TMZ.
Source BuzzFeed.
From The Hill
Health and Human Services Secretary Robert F. Kennedy, Jr. recently launched a new cooking show on HBO called “The Real Food Show.”
There are two kinds of people in this world: those who find it acceptable to be a little tardy and those who consider it an affront to all that is decent. As someone who frequently runs late, I’m often relieved when someone else is, too. And I don’t mind if a friend is a bit behind; the worst-case scenario is I have a few minutes of peace in which to stare at my phone. But the perpetually punctual see this as disrespect, as showing up late is a sign you don’t value others’ time, that you believe what you’re doing is more important.
The reality is often much more banal. Chronically late people may overestimate how long something will take them (like getting ready or commuting), are perhaps multitasking, or lose track of time.
Of course, few people would be satisfied with waiting at a restaurant for an hour while their date swears they’re only ten minutes away. Is there a socially acceptable sweet spot for tardiness that satisfies both the need for punctuality while giving grace to the time-challenged? To answer that question, I enlisted the help of three people with unique viewpoints: an etiquette expert, a researcher who has studied lateness, and an extremely punctual guy who has strong feelings on the matter.
Answers have been lightly edited and condensed for clarity.
“Five minutes late to a Zoom call or a scheduled phone call for work is, in my mind, really late. Five minutes late to meet your friend at a restaurant is not very late and very forgivable. Five minutes late to their house, super forgivable. Half an hour late to dinner and they won’t seat you and now you’ve lost your table, that starts to be a bit annoying. Late to a surprise party is unforgivable. I’ve seen hosts get really upset about that one because you can likely ruin a very well-planned surprise. There’s a 15-to-30-minute arrival period for most gatherings. You push past that and you’re showing up really late. If you are going to be late, let somebody know, whether it’s a phone call or a text message.
If you were only getting together for an hour and you’re starting to push the half-hour mark, you might want to check in with someone about whether you’ve really messed up and it’s not worth it for them to stay and meet with you for 20 minutes by the time you arrive.
There are definitely friends who take advantage of other people’s time and that would be something to talk with someone about if it’s chronic and to the point where it starts ruining the experience. You could say, ‘I know that you’re often 20 to 30 minutes late when we get together for something. It would mean a lot if you could try to be on time at seven for this one.’ We can’t control how other people react. They might feel offended. They might start rattling off reasons why they’re always late and you can say, ‘I know and I understand it really does happen, but it’s been consistent enough and this one’s important. I would really love to have you get there at the start time.’ I think that can make a difference.”
—Lizzie Post, co-author of Emily Post’s Etiquette: The Centennial Edition
“Being late differs across the world. We have wide windows of time or very narrow ones depending on the culture. In our research, we were comparing Dutch, South African, and Pakistani norms. We knew that there would be differences, but we had no idea how much. Pakistanis really have a different idea about lateness. They’re much more flexible about it. The window’s much wider. For the Dutch and South Africans, the window is about 15 minutes. After that, people will start thinking they’re not coming anymore or start calling. But for Pakistanis, that moment arrives much later.
For people who grew up in cultures that are more aligned with the Protestant work ethic, we would say there’s a deal between two people about the time frame. If you don’t conform to that, then you violate that norm and then you are late. For Pakistanis, it is a time frame that aligns with the clock, but it depends on who is there, not so much as a deal between two people. The Dutch are very egalitarian. Everyone, it doesn’t matter what status you have, is allowed about 15 minutes. But we saw that for Pakistanis, if you’re meeting a very important person, then they can arrive much later.
There’s also a bit of the emotional side or the feeling that you are personally responsible and you’re rude if you don’t stick to those norms. I discussed this in class with my students because a lot of them show up late. I was saying, ‘I think it’s very rude when there’s somebody presenting and they get interrupted by doors opening.’ A lot of them said, ‘I don’t think it’s rude.’ They had different norms about that situation. Some of them agreed with me, but not everyone.
In practice, I think that it depends on how important the appointment is. In our class, we emphasized that we as teachers find being on time important. The norm violation becomes more important when it is explicit. And I have a sense that now the students are more apologetic.
In developing intercultural skills, ‘bridging’ is often trained. One of the things in bridging is to make expectations explicit. It involves explaining how violating the norms surrounding them are experienced, and then trying to find solutions that are acceptable for both sides. Often, this leads to people agreeing that it means give and take, but it can also mean changing procedures or rules.”
—Wendelien van Eerde, associate professor at Amsterdam Business School at the University of Amsterdam
“For a home-hosted dinner party, no more than 30 minutes late before it’s inconsiderate.
For dinner reservations at a restaurant, five minutes before is inconsiderate as normally your party can’t be seated until everyone is there and making everyone wait for you isn’t cool.
For house party gatherings, show up whenever unless specifically asked by the host to be there at a specific time.
For work-related situations, like being on set ready to shoot at your scheduled call time, be there five minutes before your call time. The crew got there on time to prepare for you. Show them the same respect. Your time is not more valuable than theirs.”
—Bobby Berk, interior designer and host of HGTV’s Junk or Jackpot?
Try as we might to get everything done, leave the house in a timely manner, and hope for no traffic, life often has other plans. Lateness happens. But as long as you make a good faith effort to be on time, openly communicate when you’re running behind, and don’t make a habit of it, consider a 10-to-15 minute window an appropriate buffer. Any later and you might start to lose goodwill.
Source: Vox.
From The Hill
Sen. Rick Scott (R-Fla.) on Monday said Rep. Max Miller (R-Ohio), who is facing calls to step down over allegations of abusing his ex-wife Emily Moreno, should not be serving in the House. “First off, he shouldn’t be in office, right?” Scott told MeidasTouch’s Pablo Manríquez in a brief interview. “And everybody should be held…
Lincoln Center Theater announced today the complete cast and creative team for this fall’s August Wilson’s Seven Guitars at LCT’s Off Broadway Mitzi E. Newhouse Theater, with Jason Dirden, Russell Hornsby and Kristolyn Lloyd, among others, on board. Directed by Ruben Santiago-Hudson, the previously announced Seven Guitars begins performances on Thursday, November 5 with an […]
Source: Deadline.
Dua Lipa and Callum Turner set the standard for newlywed dressing at last night’s premiere of ‘One Night Only.’
Source: Vogue
Matt Rife looks like he has a new woman in his life … stepping out with another blonde just months after splitting from his ex, Mariah Morse. The comedian hit the Red Clay Strays concert in Boston on Saturday night with a mystery woman on his arm…
From TMZ.
From The Hill
Democrats have a slight edge over Republicans on their economic messaging for the first time in nearly a decade, according to a new survey. The Reuters/Ipsos poll, published this week, found that 37 percent of voters say they prefer Democrats’ approach to handling the economy. Another 36 percent said they prefer Republicans and 27 percent…
The Welsh language version of the classic 1977 film will feature Matthew Rhys as Han Solo.
Source: BBC.
From The Hill
Political commentator Bill O’Reilly on Monday called progressive candidate Abdul El-Sayed a “nut” that will probably win in Michigan’s Senate race. In an “On Balance” interview with NewsNation’s Leland Vittert, O’Reilly argued that in the Democratic primary on Tuesday, “turnout will be low and it’ll be true believers in the socialist communist cause.” “The nut…
